Your apartment is in the BEST place. This dude knows it. And in your ad for a roommate, you're very specific - you want a DUDE. NO BITCHES. And this one is perfect. Your schedules should sync up well, as in you'll barely see each other. However, in the first day that they move in... you start to wonder if this is a dude. Stroking on the couch, it looks like fingering... is it fingering? When they see you, it turns into stroking. Just dudes stroking, he says. Weird, but whatever.

You really are finding this body... interesting. Sexy. Yikes. But you're not gay. So what's the deal? You decide to ask him if he's gay, wondering if maybe that's what the deal is - I mean, he's wearing tight leggings and a tank top underneath the puffy sweater. And he says he is... though you're still not sure.

When you go into the bathroom to see about it, you're sure those are breasts. He sees you and starts... stroking? His dick? Again, he just can't help but stroke his cock. And you leave. But all this has you excited. So you confront him in bed, saying you'd like to be Stroke Buddies.

He takes the bait and starts stroking under the covers. Are you into men? Or have you figured out, with the high-pitched moans... is this a GIRL?

Months later, she's confused... "Yo, dude. What’s this? I saw an ad - you’re looking for a female roommate? Well, I mean, you’re allowed to do what you want. I’m just… I guess I was hoping for this. Listen, I have something to show you. Something interesting, sure. Sit back, get comfortable. You’re going to kind of… freak out. This will be some real bro stuff, for real."